POUGHKEEPSIE, NY – As people mourned the death of 65-year-old Gerald Teller, people who knew him were quick to point out that the allegedly devoted husband and father never even came close to being as cool as his obituary suggested. “He was okay, I guess, but writing that he was always the life of the party was an outright lie, and everybody that knew him knows full well that he wasn’t charming or charismatic in any way whatsoever”, said Mark Krüger, his neighbor of twenty years who witnessed Teller’s incredibly bland personality and his painfully average sense of good and evil.
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